I gots me some stuff.

Indeed!

Actually, I didn't do the getting so much as others have done the giving. But, I felt the inexplicable need to use a personal ethical dative today. The "me" in "I gots me some stuff" is, grammatically speaking, a personal ethical dative. I only know this because it's a biggie in the Appalachian dialect. Why it's a personal ethical dative and not some other gawdawful long name leaves me both clueless and uninspired to get a clue. Of course the personal part's pretty easy to pick out. But, ethical? And dative? I suppose I could believe the ethical part might be connected to the fact that the "I got me" construction might be used to keep from inadvertently misleading someone into thinking "I got them" something when I actually got it for myself. Dative is beyond me. I'm sure it's not because it let's you know who 'dat' is for. Maybe it should be.

There's your useless dialect trivia for the week. Yeehaw!


Now for said stuff. Evil Twin's Wife, whose Glamorous Life of a Hausfrau is deftly hidden on my blogroll under Evil Twin's Wife, has given me my very first blog award. Yay, ETW!

(Okay, I effed up the picture thingy. I'll fix tomorrow. It's a Roar for Powerful Words Award from the Shameless Lions Writing Circle that you can see here. I really don't think I've been blogging long enough to qualify for awards yet, but I sure do appreciate the thought.

With awesome power comes awesome responsibility, so I'm supposed to edify you folks with three tips on blogging. I know you're all salivating over gathering the pearls of wisdom I must've acquired in these last couple of months. After dropping the three pearls on you, I need to name five people from my blogroll to honor with this award.

Lesson 1: Do not blog about the merciless deaths of fuzzy creatures. For some reason, people do not find this entertaining. Go figure.

Lesson 2: There are limits. Really, you got a blog and thought, "now I can do anything I want." Wrong again. It is a cold, cruel world. I have noticed there are limits to how gross a post may be. It disturbed me as I'm sure it is disturbing you now. Just realize that when it comes to gross, if your mother would have hit you on the back of the head with a dishtowel if you said what you just wrote at her kitchen table when you were in high school, then it's probably okay. If she would have sent you to your room, it will still fly. If she would have cried while muttering, "where did I go wrong," you've hit the edge of blog decency. If she would have thrown up and started trying to cast Satan from your soul, you're on the fringe. If she would have given you that totally blank worrisome stare while slack jawed and searching your face for any semblance of human, then start backing slowly out of the room while trying to look harmless and make it to the phone to call the men in the lab coats to come get you, you've moved beyond the fringe and need to pull back. For the good of your readers' minds, pull it back just a little.

Lesson 3: Don't make yourself a bunch of rules. The fun of blogging is that you can do whatever you want with your blog each day. I sat out to only write about stereotyping. I could've gone every day and not run out of stuff to say, but who wants to write about the same types of things every day. Sometimes, you just want to have fun. Even if you sat out to do an all fun, all the time kind of blog, there will be days when you, as a person, need to be serious.

Now for the better part: Naming names.

jedijawa whose blog is on the blogroll under this is not my blog. He writes about a wide variety of stuff, drawing from many sources. You never know what will the topic will be, but it's always interesting and well-written.

Tequila Mockingbird, aka, Freckles McFlaskaction because she cracks me up on a regular basis. Her blog is always well-written and entertaining. And, bonus, she also throws awesome drink recipes up for all to enjoy. Um, maybe "throw up" wasn't the best verb choice...

Preposterous Ponderings because she is a really powerful writer. She can relate from the depths of seriousness to the sublimely hilarious. A mother of six boys, she is very down to earth and that's how I like my writers best.

Chris James, whose blog is listed as A Sour Apple Tree. He also writes about a variety of stuff, from sports to politics to Appalachia, and sometimes he shares great recipes. All of it very well written.

Ron, from Warped Mind of Ron. Ron writes a blog, poetry, and self-analysis, among other things. He's very open in what he shares. It's like a window into someone else's world. It's a good world.

Before I go, I'll share my last "gots me something." An hour ago (when I started writing this), I was getting ready to go to bed. At that time, it was 3:30 in the morning and I should be ashamed for being the night owl that I am. Actually, it's not choice. I just finally felt tired enough to sleep despite pain (which is laughing at pain meds tonight). So, I'm tired and sleepy. I hear a tiny noise in the bathroom behind me. I look to see two of my cats in obvious Elmer Funt stances.

It's real cold here tonight. I knew they were hunting wabbit. So, I creep that way to get a peek just in time to see my Buddha grabbing an obviously well-worn and injured mouse with his mouth. Eeeeeeeeeeeek!

I kiss that cat on his tiny freckled lips. I let him eat gravy right off my dinner plate. I'm feeling a little yukked out when the mouse got a sudden burst of energy and shot through three rooms to the other side of the house (open floor plans...I hate them). So now the dogs are both barking like mad because the cats are chasing a mouse and I'm running round going "oh, oh, oh"). Alas, it was the mouse's last burst of energy.

I know. I just broke my first lesson.

EDITED TO ADD: Rodney, who regularly has me in stitches on his blog Mental Poo. Really, if you haven't already checked him out you must at the very least treat yourself to a read about this guy he works with named Barry. It's one of the funniest things I've ever read. There is only one Midget Man of Steel, so ask for him by name.